Vulnerability

There is nothing more vulnerable than opening the front door to a newly formed business. When I opened my business I felt filled with hope, longing, and curiosity. I craned my neck to see if a line had formed outside the shop just waiting to be let in, with hope there were people who trusted in me and my talents. Throughout that process, I grew far faster than I expected. As someone that went through four years of EMDR therapy, where every two weeks I felt a level of vulnerability unknown to me before, I smugly thought that was it. I had mastered vulnerability and got that gorgeous shiny gold star. I can only laugh and gently shake my head at the absurdity of that thought. 

Being a business owner was that dream in my heart that you don’t dare utter for worry the fragility of the belief would instantly crumble.  This is the culmination of decades of growth, expansion, and integration. Below I’m sharing a poem I first wrote as an offering for my 200 hour yoga graduation class. The kind words and emotion evoked during our final class was palpable and there was such a beautiful spark of hope and exhaustion in all the us. Those emotions were echoed with the launch of Musings and Modalities and I am so thankful to continue to grow in my own vulnerability. 

Vulnerability

A seedling bursts forth in damp smelling earth 

An upward offering of underground strength 

Rooted in hope 

Unburdened by memories:

Of past aches 

Of unresolved discussions 

Of dread and dis-ease 

Water remembers yet the seedling only knows how to move to the light:

To be amenable 

To unfold 

To persist