Is this all there is?

full moon offering i want it all musings musings and modalities poet poetry reflections shaman poet your pragmantic shaman bestie Jul 25, 2022

The full moon at twilight surrounded by trees.

Is this all there is?

Behind me I see struggle, wanting, and dreaming

Before me I see struggle, wanting, and dreaming

In me I feel discontent, disconnected, disappointed

I wanted better for myself and yet here I am accepting the path laid before me

Where are my European adventures?

Where are my hair-raising stories and near-misses?

Have I lived at all?

In 31 years, the most used description of me is a good girl

I can say the same for most dogs

Adventure awaits and I’m too busy being miserable to heed the call

Or did the call not come at all?

Perhaps adventure passed on me and saw no potential for change here

No chance of fun

Only overthinking, regret, and shame.

Fun is seemingly a fantasy akin to dragons

My soul’s contact can’t only be responsibilities

I want my adventure without fear or guilt

I want it all